March 2009
13 posts
WatchJust as awesome as I knew it would be.
Breaking CP news...
I think I like Pink. The singer. Now what?
I am completely miserable, San Diego
ARGH! Last night I came home and I guess I was especially exhausted or something because I feel asleep with my contacts in, which I NEVER DO. For a reason. Because it makes my eyes hurt like crazy hell the next day. Which they do now. They won’t stop tearing, and that has made my nose run constantly and turned me into a mouth breather, which is making me nauseous. Won’t somebody please...
WatchLaffs.
This week I have been watching the Late Night with Jimmy Fallon. It has been funny, but only because funny people have been guests. And “Slow Jam the News” is pretty funny, but mostly because of that guy from the Roots. Jimmy is no Conan, but I keep reading that even Conan was not particularly funny for the first year or two. I was like a zygote back then (zigote? nah), so what...
I guess that depends upon how you define “class” →
wordplay:
YOU. GUYS. I was doing research for work today and I stumbled upon–nay, I specifically sought out–the website of one Countess Luann deLesseps, whose book on etiquette comes out from…
Official review by the Clownpenis forthcoming.
Rent-a-cat →
(via flakesofgrey)
Best. Idea. Ever.
WatchYour morning workout.
snow is stupid
This is just a note to say, to the world, to the millions who don’t care…I am totes freezing! In my own home! Fingers are going numb and I hate winter.
I want to go to here. →
January 2009
2 posts
Wedding (Taco) Bells: Couple Marries At Taco Bell →
December 2008
3 posts
blue christmas
missing oscar-winner Tim Robbins. single tear.
Liz: Do you know the postmaster general?
Jack: I do, but we had a falling out over the Jerry Garcia stamp. If I wanted to lick a hippie I’d just return Joan Baez’s phone calls.
a little fluff
November 2008
1 post
Panda bites student seeking a hug →
October 2008
3 posts
and it spreads like one too
Me: clownpenis.fart
Lindsay: That sounds like a virus.
Me: It’s an old snl skit and a phrase I use way too often.
Lindsay: Do you say dot fart?
Me: Usually just clownpenis. You’d be amazed at how often it applies.
Lindsay: Happy Thursday!
Me: It’s Friday, clownpenis.
Me: See?
Linsday: I just used it.
Lindsay: My roomie said, “I’m going to break up with my...
the Mrs. Foofy t-shirt (unofficial)
September 2008
2 posts
13 things that rocked my face off this week (that...
1. This video
http://www.nbc.com/Saturday_Night_Live/video/clips/palin-hillary-open/656281/
is AMAZING. Spot on.
2. Anna’s great news! Congratulations, so proud of you! And so is my mom.
3. USC clowns Ohio State 35-3. National title anyone?
4. Brad Pitt in Burn After Reading. SO funny! My sweet Chad…
”Do you have anything to drink?”
”I have...
August 2008
9 posts
dso:
I’ve had these contact lenses since the Coolidge administration. I think they’re starting to go.
Hahahaha, this is so funny, and I can relate. Mine were wearing thin, but then I found some from like three years ago behind the cabinet. So fresh!
Question to Ponder
breakingfree:
Since Cambria doesn’t believe Delaware exists…does that mean she doesn’t believe in Joe Biden? Or does it mean she doesn’t believe in his political experience?
Hmmm…
Haha, believe me when I tell you that I have been struggling with this for two days. Here is all I have come up with:
1) I do, in fact, believe in Joe Biden.
1.5) I do, in fact, like Joe Biden. I feel good about...
flakesofgrey:
Doing it old school…
Thanks for...
You can't work here, but you can shop here...
This week I applied for a job at Bluefly. I didn’t really think I was qualified for it when I found it, but then I wrote a cover letter that made me think maybe they would call. Naturally they didn’t. But they did send me a coupon for $30 off of my next purchase. Gee, thanks.
A Panda lovers dream. I wish they had one for... →
(via flakesofgrey)
Oh my gosh, this is easily the coolest thing I have ever seen! New life dream!!! Thanks for posting, Friend!
What Would Mulder Do?
Today I looked at the Montauk Monster for almost 20 seconds, total, over three viewings. It was introduced to me on Saturday, when I looked at it for almost 2 seconds. So you see, I’m growing stonger. And now I have a “theory”:
Clearly, it is a koala. I mean look at it. Everyone who’s anyone knows that Australia has been trying to rid themselves of those clowns for...
2012
According to The X Files, the world will be colonized by aliens in this year.
It’s also the number of emails I had at work this morning after two weeks off.
Coincidence? Almost certainly.
Vacation? Over.
July 2008
1 post
The Truth Is Out There: My Encounter With an...
breakingfree:
Okay, not really. But this encounter was as frightening as what I believe an encounter with an alien would be (if not more).
Last night, around 8, I went out to check if my laundry room was free. (FYI- It wasn’t, I will probably forget that fact as the story progresses) Well, I bent down to put my key into the door and felt something hit the back of my head. I freaked out,...
June 2008
18 posts
apocalypse Duggar
wordplay:
Why oh why is the Duggar family website down? Many of you may not be aware of this, but Cambria and I are sort of obsessed with what we call “the freak channel”, a.k.a. TLC, and we especially like the mini-docs/shows about people with ridiculous amounts of children (Jon & Kate Plus Eight, anyone?) or people who eat a ridiculous amount of food (I Eat 30,000 Calories a Day) or...
Would you be my friend #1
flakesofgrey:
Would you still be my friend if we went to a concert together and I peed in a cup midset to avoid missing any of the show?
Ummm, hypothetically speaking…? Haha, YES!!! PS, that was never fully explained to me. Logistically, I mean…
update on my cookie situation / hi, i'm cambria,...
Tonight I came home and shmoozed with the cast of characters in my living room for nearly an hour before it occured to me that I still had two and a half cookies in my room. So I said goodnight and got the eff out of there. (Hey, you guys want to get the fuck out of the breakroom?!) But once in my room I discovered that I actually put them properly away in the kitchen last night. So I went...
suddenly a week seems like a long time
Tuesday:
1. Wake up in gecko shirt and tinkerbell pants.
2. Rush to appointment uptown in first clothes I can get my hand on. Old black v neck shirt (Lakewood Target, senior year of college, $14.99), Gap slim-fit jeans (Pasadena Gap, fall 2004, on sale! $19.99), and hot pink Havaianas (Santa Monica Urban Outfitters, December 2004, on sale! for $10).
Look, when you where an outfit that was...
so NOT what I thought it was going to be...... →
Like Brian Boitano, I skate for myself
What I wore on Monday:
1. Wake up in old white t-shirt and evil Tinkerbell the pants. The pants are evil. Tinkerbell is pretty alright.
2. Dress for work, wondering why it isn’t a thousand degrees outside. Peach colored James Perse shirt (Nordstom Rack by South Coast Plaza, avec la Kim, 2005, $19.99. R.U. Blue? straight leg jeans (Express, South Street Seaport, September 2006, on...
i know you don't really care, BUT...
Sundays outfits…
1. Wake up (very, very reluctantly) in fish t-shirt and sheep shorts. Supposed to be on train back to NY in like 30 minutes. Crap! Throw on matchstick jeans (see every damn day), black ribbed tank by Sparkle (Urban Outfitters, $10, fall 2004), purple printed camisole (NEW!, Gap by Anna’s work, on sale! for $9.99, last Thursday), silver flats (see Friday), printed...
shameless self-promoting
katherinemarie:
hey there guys! if you visit my page and ever read that cute description over there to the right you might have noticed i updated it recently.
i started a second tumblr!
i’m training for a sprint triathalon that happens at the end of august and i’m keeping a tumblr to document it. fun stuff. check it out.
it’s called: i’m not a runner!
let me know your...
Saturday
1. Wake up in fish t-shirt and sheep shorts. See Friday for fascinating deets. Not.
2. Next: train ride to Conneticut. When I travel, especially on planes, but also, apparently, on trains, I like to appear worldly and sophistocated, yet casual and cool. I usually give this way too much thought. Also, there are many comfort and practicality dilemas that arise. For example, if you wear...
Ensem catch up
I’m sure you’ve been on the edge of your chair for three days, wondering what I’ve been wearing. “How unlike Cambria to start something online and then totally ignore it…” you probably said. Well cool out haters, I’m back.
Friday
1. Wake up in Zara animals t-shirt and Nick and Nora sheep shorts. Amazingly the same as what I wore last on Thursday.
...
So totally unnecessary...
So I was doing my laundry today (warm family—reds, browns, dark pinks, oranges, citrons, and some choice blacks) and I was thinking about how much clothing I have. A lot. And I weeded out a few things to get rid of, but it can be hard. I get attached. I love them all like family!
Sometimes I play this game with myself where I examine my current outfit and try to remember the...
Clownpenis of the day
I realize that we haven’t had a clownpenis around the old clownpenis lately, so I present to you Katherine Heigl. Ladies is penises too.
Why, you might ask. I love her, you might say, Knocked Up was so funny. And 27 Dresses! Oh those dresses! They were so funny and there were 27 of them! Well, that may be, but today Katherine announced that she would not be submitting herself for...